Click Here If You Want To See A Drawing I Did Of A Masturbating Monkey

Low Expectations proof copies have arrived! Huzzah! 


So, here is the grand unveiling! The cover art is by Natasha Law, but each chapter starts with a little illustration that I have drawn. It was not always easy to doodle a description of titles such as: ‘Apparently, It Was A Musical Vibrator’, ‘Post-Apocalyptic David Lynch Zombies’ and ‘Turbans Aren’t Deranged’. But I think I pulled it off! 

Low Expectations is an absurdist love story set in the fashion industry of East London. Imagine if VICE wrote chick-lit and you’ll have an idea of what to expect! (Don’t expect zombies. There are no zombies.) It is out with Quercus Books on July 15th and you can pre-order a copy on Amazon. They are as shiny, bright and beautiful as a girl could hope!

I have also written a short, illustrated prequel to L.E. that will come out in flip-book and ebook form in the lead up to the launch. Here are a few illustrations/jokes that got the chop as being too risqué, though I am fond of them. Particularly the monkey! 

‘Darling! Don’t bite your nails. It’s like Masturbating – In – Public!’




‘She was like a love-struck cow, of the Cambodian variety. That is- tied to a tree, blissfully unaware that she was about to be bazooka’d by tourists on a military firing range.’ 



So, a bit dark and not very loved up. However, swing by on Valentine’s Day for some pure romance! I’ll be posting new illustrations of ‘DRESS, MEET… COCKTAIL’ for Parisian bar suggestions to complete your evening.